12:08 p.m. - 2005-01-09
stairs - 2 Kelly - 0
My friend Alec is a ninja. If you throw something at him EVEN IF HE'S NOT FACING YOU he will catch it.
One day Alec was mountain biking down a hill with my friend KC. Alec was going too fast and hit a rock. The force of how fast he was going + the sudden stop caused by the rock sent him flying over the handle bars of his bike. his body flew past KC who was a good ten feet in front of Alecs stopped bicycle. Alec hit the ground and went straight into a somersault (the kind you used to do at daycare down grassy hills with your friends) when he came out of the somersault he stood straight up and started running until he slowed to a stop. Instead of dieing in this situation like a normal person would have. Alec came out with only a broken collar bone and a useless heap of metal that was once his bike.
Alec wins because he is a ninja.
I on the other hand am NOT a ninja.
long story short. I fell down a flight of stairs in my own backyard.
I have a good sized bruise all up the back of my left leg and my left butt cheek.
I would post pictures but I am almost certain that there isn't a one of you who would like to see my nasty ass with my pants off.
but just so you know.
the score is now
stairs - 2
Kelly - 0
ALSO!
After I fell down the stairs we went to my dads sisters house who is WAY too rich...
This is a bidet. A bidet is a french bathroom fixture used especially for bathing the external genitals and the posterior parts of the body. A bidet is something only the french, the weird, or the disgustingly rich would have in their house.
here we see Joe demonstrating how to properly use a bidet.
me taking pictures in their giant bathroom mirror!
♥
